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Showing posts from August, 2024

College Life, the Importance of a Snack Box, and How I Couldn’t Possibly Be More Proud

My mind has been disheveled over the past couple of months, anticipating and learning to adjust for my daughter’s big move. She left for college a little over two weeks ago, nearly 700 miles away. I have been worried sick, physically and mentally. She has been busy acclimating and doing her own thing. I’ve called her every couple of days, but she doesn’t always answer. I know she is busy—college life is a whole new world! Today she sent a text asking me to call her when I finished at work. I called as I walked out the door, and she was sobbing. She spilled everything she has been dealing with over the past two weeks, and I was absolutely overcome with peace knowing she felt comfortable enough to share with me. We talked and laughed and cried and talked about life and how nothing ever stops and she kept saying, “I need to think of what else to talk about!” She shared roommate drama and intimidating professors and her very own snack box beside her bed, reminiscent of Jessica Day’s bedsid

Anger as a Security Measure, the Illusion of Worthiness, and the Persistence of Hope

One thing I like about myself is that, no matter how dark my mood gets, no matter how bad circumstances get, hope always crawls into the picture. I’m not sure if this is a survival thing or a soul thing. I just know, despite past patterns and circumstances, at the end of the day, I have this tiny spark of hope left.  Yesterday, I was left reeling in anger over a person who I let into my life. I revealed too much about myself, and they twisted things around to use against me. It angers me to my core. I am full of rage and hate. And I feel like a fool. I allowed myself anger yesterday and today, and I hope I can let it go and start fresh tomorrow. However, if I have learned anything, it is that rage and anger, although they play a very important role in our “security settings,” are also unable to be sped through. There is no shortcut. They must be felt in all of their entirety for as long as the course exists. When I feel my space, energy, physical being has been violated, anger is quick