Healthcare Woes, A Good Man Gone Home, and Intentional Action vs. the Loudest Voice in the Room

 What a whirlwind the past couple of days have been. Working in healthcare is not for the faint-of-heart. I chose healthcare as a young person because I wanted to help people. I sincerely, fully, and with all of my whole heart, wanted to help people. That part of myself has never changed. Healthcare has changed dramatically. I remember working at Horton's Pharmacy in Belton back in the early aughts. I was a 15-year old full of energy and willingness to work hard and assist however needed. I remember vacuuming one evening before closing as the pharmacist sat on his stool in the corner. When I finished vacuuming, I was rolling the cord back on the vacuum when he pointed out a penny in the corner. He told me it had been there for years and no one had ever picked it up. That he kept his eye on it and waited for the person who would eventually pick it up. Young and naïve Lindsey reached down cheerfully to collect this coin and place it in his palm. Only all of these years later do I recognize the condescension in that interaction. One very small, very powerful trait that has stuck around and been passed down throughout the years in my experience while working in healthcare. Side note, my former coworker, pharmacist Dennis Peterson, passed away today. He was one of these old-style pharmacists, however, one who used humor and charm to make everyone's day just a little better, a little softer. I can picture him in Paradise now: toes in the sand, waves crashing at his feet, a whiskey in one hand and a cigar in the other. He was one of the good ones. One of many men who sat around that coffee pot at Horton's Pharmacy trading old stories like badges of honor. I miss the slow, meaningful parts of pharmacy. I miss being able to help patients without Corporate and Big Pharma and PBMs and Insurance Companies taking over time and money and resources. Healthcare has turned from "health care" into Health Business. Patient Care is not at the top of concerns, no matter how many Officials swear it is the number one priority. I have been conflicted for some time now. Concerned and fearful of the future of healthcare, wondering if the time has come for me to step away. I was speaking with a good friend today about how disrupted I feel in my life because of this. She said, "If we ever become the type of people that enjoy that type of thing or the people that aren't disrupted by it then we will know that there's no hope for us." If we are disrupted, we must persevere. I believe the disrupted are the only ones who can make effective, long-term change. The ones who are fed-up and disgusted and disrupted by the system. Who can do their job, do it well, truly help people, and keep their eyes and ears open. Who can make slight adjustments while on their paths. Like the butterfly flapping it's wings in Asia. I believe small, intentional actions can make greater change than the loudest voices in the room, building, city, country. So we keep moving forward. We don't lose heart. We keep going.